And now it’s tariff-ic. Trump dixit, it will be bitter duties for everyone, for some more. What do you want to do with the duties? Simple and ingenious as communication: first of all I show that I am in charge, because I have the richest market in the world, where everyone wants to sell; secondly, with the proceeds of the duties I reduce the public debt of the Americans without taxing them, they hate taxes and they will be happy, indeed they will love me if I reduce them, as I did with the web tax.

In the Trump world the message is the means, the opposite of McLuhan, to force others to listen to him and open a negotiation. It’s going to be a huge boar market with the Trump mansion, techniques from flat buyers to negotiate, your house is worthless because I am big and I decide, I am the dollar, I am US customs, and I also have the most powerful army in the world, at least until the Chinese giant enters the field. Are you TikTok? If you’re not American you don’t sell anything here. You are BMW? Either you produce here or you no longer sell. Camembert can be taxed with 100 per cent duties, foie grais 200 per cent, that’s how these French cheese makers learn, if they want to sell Chanel they have to buy Elon’s satellites, like that good girl Meloni is doing, the fierce dame, as Milei calls her, one who talks to his dead dog. No duties on Argentinian meat for him, he is a friend, and we Americans like asado in steakhouses. We will only tax Parmesan cheese, which is made by those communists from Emilia, and if De Luca gets off his back, no duties on Mondragone and its surroundings.

Duties will be like those things that get excited and rise when there is blood, that of MAGA’s enemies. For some they will be bitter, for others sweet, depending on the empathy of the Tycoon. In Spain is that insufferable Sanchez cooler than Banderas? Patanegra 400%, I’ve seen him ogling Melania, and maybe Ivanka too. The Danes won’t give us Greenland? Duties on Royal Dansk, the Danish biscuits, up to 2000%, which all that butter is bad for us Americans since we are already obese with McDonald’s products, which are more Yankee and named after me. Trump’s tariff promises to be a drag.